Here We Are Now, Entertain Us.

What I'm into for amusing myself. I use and abuse Netflix on a daily basis, and am in love with being able to view stuff on their website. I also watch my favorite shows on Hulu (remember, we have no cable, satellite, digital converter box...read that entry, people!!). So, I read and watch DVDs and workout and surf the Net. Right now, my obsessions are:

The public library (this isn't a photo of my library, but how much do I lust after this one?!). How can you not enjoy a place that just lets you take their stuff via the honor system (okay, there's a card, and they'll track you down with their thugs if you haven't paid your fines, but you get the idea). I take the kids a few times a month for new books for all of us. We also enjoy all their free entertainment-storytime, jugglers, magicians, etc. Librarians rule.




Oh Weeds, you are my crack addiction. I started watching the first 2 seasons on Netflix, in a totally random way. The site recommended this show based on something else I'd rented, and I got hooked instantly. Season 3 had to be mailed to me, and I'm about halfway through the season 4 episodes. Mary Louise Parker is just so hot and amazing, and I love the show.

I Feel Pretty, Oh So Pretty! Clothes and Accessories I Can't Live Without.

Down East Basics T-Shirts. Their camisoles are also the best you can get. I spend tons shopping on their website, and I freaking love these tees. I have them in at least 25 colors and varieties.



From HSN, Technibond® Torqued Circle Pendant in yellow gold. Gorgeous and shiny, my go-to gold necklace.



Adorable and cool peace sign necklace in silver by Jessica Hicks. If I could afford the gold one, I'd get that, too.



Ariat Fatbaby boots. If you don't see why these are cool, I just don't understand you at all.



Lucky Brand Jeans, handbags. I buy these off Ebay to save me a good fifty bucks or so, but I think they're worth retail price. Nice soft leather, it gets better with use and aging. I have this specific bag in tan, and many other bags by this company. Right now I want that slouchy hobo like the one on "Weeds."

I'd Rather Die Than Not Eat and Drink These...

Argentinian Malbec wine, my latest find. I've tried several brands, the one in the photo is good. Sadly, I cannot for the life of me remember which one I had from Whole Foods that was so good I drank the entire bottle myself in one night. It didn't prevent my raging hangover headache, but was so worth it.



Seattle's Best Coffee is, hands down, the best coffee available. I should note that Starbucks now owns them, something I wish wasn't true. Anyway, their french roast is very dark and rich, and my personal heaven is a room that smells like a pot of this stuff brewing. Sigh.



If I wasn't already married, I'd propose to Hershey's Special Dark chocolate bars. Intense, yet sweet, creamy and awesome. Fairly points-friendly, too. For the regular size bar, it's just 4. I like to eat a little segment (about 1 point) a day for a little treat. Oh, and no evil high fructose corn syrup.



Pistachios are the best nuts in the history of nuts. The shells take forever to pop open, and I can eat them by the truckoad. Then they make me fart, though.

Things I Love...That Make Me Gorgeous.

Estee Lauder Youth Dew Bath Oil-I hardly ever get the time to have a long, hot bath. When I do, I always use this stuff. It's so earthy, sexy, interesting and complicated. It makes the whole bathroom smell amazing, and it lingers on my skin until I shower again.




Trader Joe's Shea Butter bar soap. For about three bucks, you get a huge bar of creamy, fresh, clean bubbly fun. I can't live without it.




Tom Ford Black Violet is my ultimate fragrance. It's so sexy, musky, and unique. It also costs a freaking fortune. For hot days, I've been enjoying the Bigelow Lemon, available at Bath and Body Works. Also, Sensuous is a nice warm scent for evening or a cooler day.







Act mouthwash, bubble gum flavor. I'm obsessed with mouthwash, because I have weird teeth that are prone to cavities. Dentists always tell me this is the best brand to use, but I don't like swishing for 30-60 seconds with most washes. This, however, tastes just like bubblegum. Yum!




MoroccanOil is giving me the best hair days EVER, even with the pain in the ass glass bottle.




DHC-Love them. Mild Body Shampoo is sweet and fresh, Cleansing Oil removes makeup without making your eyes burn, and White Sunscreen protects with Titanium and Zinc Oxide, but is never greasy or thick.









Aquaphor fixes everything, I tell you!

Book Review: Goodnight Nobody

By: Jennifer Weiner



I'll admit upfront that I adore this author, and love every single thing she writes. If she took on the job of writing catalogue descriptions, I'd buy every item. This book is a little different from her others, and she says in the "Ask The Author" section that it's far less autobiographical than what she usually writes.

The main character, Kate, is a reluctant stay-at-home-mom in an upper class, cookie-cutter suburban neighborhood. Formerly a reporter in NYC, she decides to investigate the murder of another mom in the neighborhood who she barely knew.

I can't tell you how I identified with this character. She feels lost, out of touch and bored being with her kids. Of course, that leads to endless guilt and feelings of inferiority when she's around all the other "perfect" moms who feed their kids healthy, organic snacks and provide them with constant mental stimulation. Nobody else seems to feel like she does, and her husband often treats her like she's less than a person. Oh, and tells her to join a gym (yeah, I know).

This is a great fast read, something that I devoured in just a few days.

Book Review: B As In Beauty

By: Alberto Ferreras



The story of a fat, downtrodden, depressed and self-hating woman who learns who she really is and gains confidence after becoming a successful member of an escort service. Yeah, I saw that a guy had written this book, and rolled my eyes, too. I thought, "Only a man would think that a woman would realize how great she really is by being paid to fuck old rich guys." Well, that's not really the story here. This character, Beauty ("B"), falls into employment with the agency, where the owner becomes her confidante and coach, if you will. The jobs don't involve actual sex, but she realizes that she has to love herself in order for others to see how wonderful and worthwhile she really is. The clients are the first experiences she's had with men who value her as she looks, extra weight and all.

Ferreras does a remarkably good job presenting the mind of a woman, and I actually forgot that it wasn't written by a female until I closed the cover at the end of the book (which I read in one day).

It's a good one, at least worth checking out from the library.

Movie Review: The Collector

I'm going to start reviewing movies I see and books I read. I don't see a lot in the theater, so I'll weed out the things I get from Netflix that are worth talking about. Books, on the other hand, I devour, and I hope I can come up with interesting stuff to say about them. Let the reviewing begin...




Cast: Josh Stewart, Michael Reilly Burke, Andrea Roth, Madeline Zima, Daniella Alonso
Director: Marcus Dunstan
Genres: Slasher Film, Horror, Sadistic Horror

Here's how you know if you should shell out the crazy price of a movie ticket: Do you like the "Saw" series? If so, check this out. It's by the same people, and has the same look and feel to it. I won't give away anything important, but here's the basic plot: A thief breaks into a family's home to pop their safe and steal an expensive jewel. He needs it for a specific reason, one that makes you understand why he's ripping someone off, an act that most of us wouldn't normally support. Anyway, while he's there, he discovers that a madman has taken some of the family members hostage, is torturing them in horrible and unique ways, AND has booby-trapped their home.

I liked it a lot. The protagonist is likeable and complicated, and the collector himself is very creepy...he also withstands amazing physical abuse without any apparent ill-effects (this is always an important trait for horror movie villains).

It's incredibly bloody and violent, you see boobs, and you'll cringe and cover your eyes a lot, but you'll have a good time. The ending is so very lame and really obvious in its goal to set you up for a sequel, but it was worth the money. Well, matinee prices.

When's My Vacation?

My better half is on vacation this week. We're doing the thing that all the cool, hip media outlets are referring to this year as a "Staycation." That phrase is only one reason why I don't watch local news broacasts anymore (their use of moronic, made-up words, and their insane focus on the weather), and it makes me want to bitch slap someone, but...it's what we're doing.

We're lucky to live in an amazing part of the country, and there are tons of great things to do. I'm finally accepting, however, what it means to try and enjoy time off work when small children are around. First, stay-at-home-moms don't have vacation time. The little people still get up at 6AM, they still demand food almost constantly, they still shit in their pants, they still need to be read to and talked to and stopped from killing themselves with sharp objects.

So, while the husband vacations, parenting still goes on. Here's what we've done so far: I took the kids to the library and Target while Mat worked on his computer set-up. We went to the coast and "enjoyed" the beach (that's a very loose use of the word, because mostly we kept the kids from running directly into the waves and being swept out to sea, then dumping baby powder on them to get the sand out of their creases). We checked out an outlet mall and picked up some new fall clothes for A&L, who have somehow outgrown everything we've ever bought for them before. We'll still be catching a matinee and going to opening day of our local county fair before the week is done.

Yeah, the days of long, lazy, sleeping-in vacations are done. No more booze-filled outings, hot and steamy meetings in the bedroom at 2PM, and Halloween movie marathons. No more running off to Vegas for a quick overnight trip because we feel like it.

There's no extra money, no extra time, no real recuperative sleep, yet...it's still amazing to see those little faces when they catch their first glimpse of the ocean. When they see a waterfall for the first time. When they get a little bite of chocolate at a fancy shop in a new town we've never been to. Is there anything sweeter than seeing them snoozing away in their carseats after a long day of adventures? I don't think there is.

My Kids Are Cool. Weird, But Cool.

I consider myself kind of strange. I've never been concerned about what everyone else is wearing/saying/eating/watching, etc. I was known to wear an ankle-length, bright orange skirt now and then in high school. I just didn't particularly give a shit what people thought of me. Now, it seems, my kids are the same way. I can't really put into words how much I want them to hold onto this trait. I love their strange, interesting, happily-dancing-around-the-house-singing-AC/DC-selves. They're fabulous!

Their favorite band...